I am sharing this with you who may be caring for a loved one suffering with a terminal illness. It is my hope that through my own personal struggle and questioning, you will be strengthened in your spirit to know His great love.
I realized today that I, like Jacob, have been wrestling with God. “God, why must my mother suffer? She’s a good woman and does not deserve to linger like this. Why Lord do you not take this cup from us?”
And, I came to know, on the quiet of the riverfront, that I am powerless. This fighting just wears me out. I cannot make my mother well. The nurses and doctors cannot bring her back to the woman she once was. None of us can add one day to her life.
It is her creator, my God who has all power over this situation. I must yield – in complete faith – to Him who is behind life itself. I must hang on to him and not let go. He won’t be one day early and He won’t be one day late.
My fighting has stopped. I will be left with a limp from her passing for the rest of my life but I am also left with His blessing of hope. I will see my mother again. Meantime, I will smooth her hair, turn her gently and kiss her forehead. And, that is enough for now. He who loves both my mother and me will one day bring us both home.
What profound love. What unspeakable compassion that could only come from God.
“I pray that out of His glorious riches He may strengthen you with power through His Spirit in your inner being so that Christ may dwell in your heart through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ and to know this love that surpasses knowledge – that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.” Ephesians 3: 16-19